Wonder Weeks Leap 9

The world has perspectives now.

Why your toddler suddenly argues with reality (and why sleep can wobble again)

Around week 59 (based on your toddler’s due date), they enter Leap 9 - the leap of principles.

If Leap 8 was about understanding how routines and sequences work, Leap 9 is about understanding that other people have their own thoughts, intentions, and points of view.

Which is a huge deal.

And yes, sleep can take a hit again, because big brain upgrades rarely arrive quietly.

Your toddler isn’t just running programs anymore.

They’re starting to question why the program exists… and whether they agree with it.

The science: What’s changing in your toddler’s brain

Leap 9 marks the early development of perspective-taking and theory of mind aka the understanding that other people are separate beings with their own ideas, emotions, and plans.

In real life, that looks like:

• You want them to sleep.

• They want to keep playing.

• Both things can be true… and that feels confusing.

According to the Wonder Weeks, supported by developmental psychology and early childhood frameworks (including the Harvard Center on the Developing Child), this leap is about recognising intentions, fairness, and cause beyond the immediate moment.

Your toddler is starting to think:

• You meant to say no.

• I meant to do it myself.

• That wasn’t what I expected.

This is early social reasoning, and it’s mentally demanding.

What this means for your toddler

You might notice:

• Strong opinions about how things should happen

• Increased protest when plans change

• Emotional reactions that feel very big for very small things

• More testing of limits, especially around sleep and transitions

• A new interest in copying adult behaviour... with commentary

They’re not being dramatic.

They’re learning that the world isn’t just mechanical, it’s relational.

Why Leap 9 feels intense for parents

Because this leap collides with autonomy.

Your toddler now understands that you have control… and that they don’t always like that.

This can make everyday moments feel like negotiations:

Shoes. Nappies. Car seats. Bedtime.

Sleep can wobble because their brain is busy processing fairness, separation, and intention, especially at night when there’s less distraction and more emotional load (but don't worry, the wobble doesn't last long. Just hold stead with however you usually put them to sleep - there is no need to introduce new sleep associations).

How to support them through Leap 9

This leap responds best to calm leadership and emotional steadiness, not power struggles.

What helps:

• Predictable routines - same order, same cues

• Clear boundaries with warmth - “I won’t let you do that, but I’m here”

• Narrating feelings - “You wanted to keep playing. It’s hard to stop.”

• Letting them practice autonomy safely - small, real choices

You don’t need to convince them. You need to anchor them.

Sleep during Leap 9: What changes (and what helps)

Common sleep disruptions include:

• Bedtime resistance

• Night wakes tied to separation or frustration

• Nap refusals that feel sudden or emotional

This doesn’t mean sleep is broken.

It means emotional awareness is expanding.

What helps:

• Keeping bedtime boundaries steady

• Allowing more wind-down time

• Responding calmly to protests without escalating

• Avoiding big routine changes mid-leap

Sleep often stabilises again once this leap integrates.

What NOT to worry about

• Strong reactions to limits

• Wanting things done “their way”

• Emotional outbursts before sleep

• Saying no reflexively

• Testing your response

All normal.

All developmental.

All temporary.

Common myths during Leap 9

Myth: “They’re trying to control everything.”

Truth: They’re discovering that other people have intentions - and figuring out how to live with that.

Myth: “Sleep problems now mean bad habits.”

Truth: This is neurological growth, not behavioural backsliding.

If you could ask an expert one thing…

“How do I hold boundaries without escalating bedtime battles?”

👉 Ask Yawn.

Yawn looks at your toddler’s age, development, temperament, and your values and helps you respond in ways that work now, not just in theory.